We fall down, we lay our crowns
At the feet of Jesus
The greatness of mercy and love
At the feet of Jesus
Lately, I've found myself thinking about this worship song. And by lately, I mean for the past couple months, not just at Capernwray. The first time the lyrics of this song really popped out to me was while I was working at Smitty's. I often sang quietly to myself at work when things were slow and I was alone in the back cleaning or whatever. And I had this song stuck in my head.
And this hit me: what does it mean to "lay our crowns at the feet of Jesus"? What struck me is the word used in the song: crowns. Crowns are worn by kings, queens, and individuals of royalty. Crowns distinguish superiority and authority. When we sing this song, we're singing something quite heavy. We're singing about laying down our crowns, the things that make us feel superior and authoritative, at the feet of Jesus. We're laying down our pride.
I really felt like I should share that with you folks. Anyway, what's been going on at Capernwray lately? Not really that much... this past week we had Wayne Lee come teach us about the book of Job. Which is a rather heavy book. My perspective of Job's life has certainly changed now. The book of Job isn't a story about extreme suffering, but of extreme faith.
This week at Capernwray, the LTS (Leadership Training Students) are gone to Urban Promise in Toronto, so the dorms seem a little emptier. Also, Steve is teaching on 1 Corinthians for the first half of the week, then around Thursday good ol' Charlie Fordham is coming to teach us about the Holy Spirit, interesting week if I do say so myself. I've heard tons about Charlie Fordham... from Ethan and Missy. I remember once after church, I think it was in March, the three of us were having a discussion about Charlie Fordham and his teaching. So I heard lots. I am looking forward to what he has to say though. I look forward to all the speakers. Ultimately it's not about the teacher, but about what he's teaching us... which is Christ.
I've been thinking a lot about God's will lately. Mainly because I've been starting to worry about what my next year is going to look like. Right now, I don't have too many options. I could go to university, no idea what for, but hey, I could just take U1. I've been considering Providence, like I was considering before Capernwray came up last year. I could just work for a year. Or I could even go back to Smitty's, which I don't particularly want to do. For some reason Smitty's has been on my heart lately. There's been a lot of things and people who have been on my heart lately. There are also some other things that I've been considering, but I'm not going to list those out because I don't want to make a big deal out of them. That was confusing, haha, sorry.
I'm going to share with you an excerpt of the book we're reading as a student body at Capernwray, which has been on my heart lately, concerning God's will:
I suppose that one of the frequent questions I am asked, by young Christians in particular, is, "How do I know the will of God?" If we are concerned to be surrendered to the will of God, He doesn't always seem to cooperate by letting us know clearly what His will is! Is that how you feel somtimes? You ask for guidance and direction but appear to receive little. However, if God's greatest desire for you is that you fulfill His will, and your greatest desire is to do His will, there shouldn't be any difficulty. If there is difficulty, somewhere along the line you have created it.
The specific will of God for us will only be found within the general will of God for all His people. There are four things the New Testament states as being God's will for you and me, and it will be within obedience to these specific instructions that His will for us individually will be found.
1. That we be holy. "It is God's will that you should be holy; that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable." (1 Thessalonians 4:3-4)
2. That we be thankful. "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5:18)
3. That we are good. "Submit yourselves for the Lord's sake to every authority instituted amongst men... For it is God's will that by doing good you should silence the ignorant talk of foolish men." (1 Peter 2:13-15)
4. That we suffer. "Those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good." (1 Peter 4:19)
Solomon wrote, "In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths." (Proverbs 3:6). We are not told to pray for guidance but to acknowledge Him, and in response He will direct our paths. Directing our paths is God's responsibility... What is more, in the process of guiding us, God is under no obligation to explain what He is doing.
© "Christ for Real" by Charles W. Price, 2011, Pg 61-63
Now, I know that everyone might not completely agree with that, and no one should believe just anything that they read, because it's not the Bible, so we need to line up what this says with Scripture. But, for the most part, I agree with what he's saying here. The Bible does state some things that are the will of God. And yes, the will of God could get messy in some circumstances, like if God's will is that I go back to Smitty's because I wasn't a good witness of Christ the first time I was there, then so be it. That situation would be particularly messy, because I wouldn't like it. Plus I made some mistakes while I was leaving there that I would have to own up to if I went back.
Something I've been learning lately: God's will isn't always what we want. In fact, often it's not what we want because our hearts are wicked and deceitful, and our hearts want things that don't line up with Christ. God's will isn't about us, it's about God and His work.
I apologize for the incredibly long blog post, but there was a lot on my mind. Also, I've just been learning so much! The awesome thing is that what I've been learning is way more than what I share in my blog! I could write a 1000 page book about all the things I've been learning. (I have to make this joke: there already has been a 1000-ish page book written about everything I've been learning, it's called the BIBLE lol). I commend all of you who actually made it through this whole post. My thoughts are running a mile a minute right now, so I should stop typing before I continue on a rampage of my thoughts, plus it's past curfew!
Bonne nuit, mes amis.
Love you all,
Janessa
P.S. I was inspired to clean up my portion of the room after posting the pictures of it! Just thought I'd let you all know, haha.
