Spinning Plates: A Short Story

Spinning Plates: A Short Story

She had a dream one night that she was on a stage surrounded with spinning plates on wires, sort of something you would see on an old episode of Ed Sullivan. Her job was to keep the plates spinning, making sure that none of them hit the ground. She was running around fixing the wires constantly so the plates would keep on spinning. None of them could wobble, none of them could fall.

She was exhausted from all the running. She couldn't take it anymore, the fatigue was too great. She collapsed on the floor and blacked out.

When she awoke from her fainting, she expected to see all the plates broken on the floor, but instead she saw a man. And the plates were still spinning. The man came toward her and said, "Come now, let's go sit in the audience seats for a while." He helped her up and started guiding her to a seat.

"I can't sit down," she said, "I need to make sure the plates keep spinning. I don't want them to fall, I can't afford for them to break."

"Nonsense," the man told her, "you sit down and rest. I'll make sure they don't fall."

They sat down together in the front row of audience seats. They watched the plates spin together. Some of them wobbled a bit, which made her very nervous, but the man would lift his hands in their direction and it would become steady again.

Suddenly, they heard a loud crash from the far left of the stage. A plate had fallen to the ground, but luckily had not broken. She sprung off her seat and ran towards it. The man followed close behind. "Oh no," she said, examining the plate in her hands, "this plate's got a chip in it."

The man examined it as well. "You're right, but it's okay, the plate will still spin." They held the plate together, placed it back on the wire, and spun it.

Another crash sounded at the far right of the stage. She went running toward where the sound was and gazed upon the shattered plate in front of her. She knelt down and cried. "What am I going to do? What am I going to do? I've failed. The plate is broken. What now?"

The man started picking up the shattered pieces. "Oh well, we'll just have to glue all the pieces back together, won't we?"

"That's impossible," she replied through her tears, "even if we could pick up all the tiny little pieces, there's no way the plate could spin again. There's no point."

"Nothing is impossible." The man started to glue the pieces back together, one by one. Feeling a bit more encouraged, she helped the man with the pieces and the glue.

Soon the plate was back together. Sure, there were cracks and some chips missing, but at least it was together. "Come on now, let's see if it will spin." The man held the plate up to her and she took the other side. "Okay, on three. 1...2...3."

They spun the plate on the wire and sure enough, it kept spinning.

Flashback Friday Post: Keep Your Eyes on Me

Originally posted October 15, 2011 as "Walk on the Water"

The air was very crisp. The breeze coming off of the lake was cool, just a hint of the temperature of the water. The waves were softly crashing against the boat I found myself in. The boat was gently rocking, as if it was rocking itself to sleep.

 One look up at the sky and I knew what to expect in the near future. Dark clouds were forming in the lowest places of heaven. The crackling of thunder haunted the other side of the lake, my destination. Suddenly, a streak of lightning shot through the pitch black canopy above my head.

  I needed to get to safety. I looked ahead; the storm threatened what lay in my future. I looked behind; the storm taunted what I put in the past. There was no way out of this storm.

The waves turned from softly crashing to violently galloping at the sides of my boat. The crisp air turned into a musky fog. The breeze turned into a full-force wind that had the temperature of death in it. It was freezing.

I saw a figure walking towards me, within the storm. At first I thought I was going crazy, that it was only a figment of my imagination. The storm was making me think things that I shouldn't. The storm was giving me one more reason to fear.

But this was real.

“Come out onto the water.” He said to me. “Come out onto the crashing waves.”

I was frightened. “Are you insane? I can’t leave this boat. I’ll drown!”

That’s when I saw him fully. He was walking on the water. “Come out into your storm. Just keep your eyes on me and I’ll keep you safe.”

I stepped out onto the rolling waves. To my surprise, I didn't sink. I kept my eyes on him.

I began to look down at my feet. Surely enough, I was walking on the water towards this man that I never knew. Or maybe I did know him. But as soon as I focused my attention on my walking, my feet began to be immersed in the salty water below.

I focused my attention back onto this man, just enough so that I’d get back on my feet again, so that I could continue walking on the water. I didn't need his help. I could do this on my own.

Eyes on my own feet, I paced faster. Only the faster I walked, the faster my feet sunk into the water. It was beyond frustrating!

“Why aren't you listening to me?” The man said. “Keep your eyes on me and I’ll keep you safe.”

Once again, I focused my attention on his face. My feet stopped slipping and I regained my balance. This time I kept my eyes on him for a little bit longer so that I could completely get back on my own feet. I left his eye contact.

My feet began to slip faster than they were before. I can do this on my own! I can do this on my own! I only need to think hard enough about it.

Suddenly, my waist was submerged in the water, too far for me to pull myself up. I needed help now. I called to him. “Please, save me. I’m going to drown! I shouldn't have tried to do this by myself. I should have listened to you! Please, I don’t want to die! I’m drowning!”

Immediately, a dry hand grabbed mine. He pulled me up, and then pulled me close to his chest. He leaned in to whisper something in my ear. “Why did you doubt, you of little faith?”

I started to sob. “I thought I could do it on my own, but now I realize that I can’t.”

“Don’t cry, dear one. I've got you now.” He said softly, wiping the tears from my eyes. “Now, let’s try this again. This time… keep your eyes on me.” 

From Younger Janessa

It's interesting how God chooses to speak to you. It's interesting how He can give someone just the right words to speak truth into your life. It's funny how sometimes that person is a different version of yourself.

I got a letter today. A letter I don't even remember writing. A letter that my 18-year-old self wrote to my future self. Apparently, my today self. A letter I wrote while I was at Capernwray. I don't remember what time during the year I wrote this letter. (I suspect near the end of my time at Capernwray because I sound surprisingly knowledgeable and really mature.) A letter full of reminders.

Honestly, this reminder from my younger self couldn't have possibly come at a better time. I needed this reminder. I needed it. I'm not gonna lie. I've compromised. I've strayed away. Not entirely, but enough that it bothers me. And I guess there's nothing really else to say except to share what the letter said.


Dear Older Janessa, 

God will take you to some dark places. Life will throw you some lemons. People will come and go like seasons. Circumstances change all the time. Sometimes life just isn't fair. But despite these uncertainties in life, I want you to know that God doesn't ever change. He's bigger than the dark places, the seasons of loneliness, and the changing circumstances. And frankly, He makes amazing lemonade when given lemons. Always remember this truth everywhere you go: "Greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world." Whatever lies and misleadings Satan may bombard you with, God's truth is bigger and better. 

I want to remind you that as a child of God, you are saved from the wrath and judgment to come. "There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ." Hardships and tribulation will come, God promises us that, but we are sealed by His blood and He will protect us from whatever we need to be protected from. "Oh death, where is your sting? Oh hell, where is your victory?" Death is not our defeat, it is our victory. 

Remember that God is the owner and provider of everything. He owns all the money in the world and He entrusts it to whom He pleases. He possesses all the strength in the world and He gives it freely to those who seek it. He holds all the joy in the world and He blesses His children with it. Run to Him for everything you need. "He will supply all of your needs according to the riches and glory in Christ Jesus." 

You are the exact person that God intended you to be. You are beautiful because He made you in His image and He is beautiful. He made you a more quiet and reserved person because He intends to use that personality through you to display His glory. He gave you a stutter because He knew that that would cause you to rely on Him completely. And only when you rely on Him completely are you truly who He made you to be. 

As you are out doing the work of the Lord, I want to remind you who your focus point is: the Lord of the work. 1 Peter 4:11 says, "Whoever speaks, speak as though they are oracles from God; whoever serves, serve as one who serves by the strength that God supplies." 

Yours truly, 
18-year-old Janessa 


I forgot how much God changed and transformed me two years ago. This was a good reminder. It's amazing that God prompted me to write to myself about changing circumstances, seasons of loneliness, dark places, and people coming and going from my life because that's everything I'm facing right now. 18 year old me seemed so put together. I wish 20 year old me was more like that.

God is bigger. God is better. God is brighter.
I need to remember that.

And I hope that this letter can be an encouragement to other people that happen across this blog post during their own dark places and seasons of loneliness.

Thank you for reading.  

Thank You

[chorus]
thank you for holding my hand
thank you for holding me still
thank for for having a plan
even if it doesn't match with my will
thank you for being my Dad
thank you for holding my tears
thank you for not getting mad
when you're next in line to my fears
thank you for being you
thank you for being Truth

[verse 1]
when I look around
I get overwhelmed
by this world full of chaos
it runs right at me
think I need a balance beam
on this earth so I don't fall off

[chorus]
thank you for holding my hand
thank you for holding me still
thank you for having a plan
even if it doesn't match with my will
thank you for being my Dad
thank you for holding my tears
thank you for not getting mad
when you're next in line to my fears
thank you for being you
thank you for being Truth

[verse 2]
when I look at me
I'm blinded by what I see
just another face in the mirror
don't know where I'm going
don't like where I've been
wish my direction was clearer

[chorus]
thank you for holding my hand
thank you for holding me still
thank you for having a plan
even if it doesn't match with my will
thank you for being my Dad
thank you for holding my tears
thank you for not getting mad
when you're next in line to my fears
thank you for being you
thank you for being Truth

[bridge]
so I'll run to you
and I'll flee from the things
that got me entangled
so I'll run to you
and I'll flee from the message
that I'm not good enough
for this world

[chorus]
thank you for holding my hand
thank you for holding me still
thank you for having a plan
even if it doesn't match with my will
thank you for being my Dad
thank you for holding my tears
thank you for not getting mad
when you're next in line to my fears
thank you for being you
thank you for being Truth

[ending]
thank you for being you
thank you for being...
the only thing in this world that is True

Still Need You

I got my heart raging in my head
And my tired body doesn't wanna leave this bed
Good enough for no one, not even my own master plan
My classic bun won't work out today
And my coffee addiction's getting the best of me
I haven't had a bite to eat
Neither have I brushed my teeth
Just laying around, watching my favourite TV show
Starting to remember those forgotten things
Lord, I still need you just as much now as on our first day

Jumped outta bed this morning
Have never felt so right
Dressed up nice and did my hair
Got all green lights on the way to where I needed to be
There was a sale at my favourite store
I beat my writer's block
Fell in love with another verse
Don't have a ton of cash, but I don't care
Made my girlfriend laugh while she was sad
I accomplished everything on my to-do list
Lord, I still need you just as much now as on our first day

Walk on the Water

The air was very crisp. The breeze coming off of the lake was cool, just a hint of the temperature of the water. The waves were softly crashing against the boat I found myself in. The boat was gently rocking, as if it was rocking itself to sleep.

 One look up at the sky and I knew what to expect in the near future. Dark clouds were forming in the lowest places of heaven. The crackling of thunder haunted the other side of the lake, my destination. Suddenly, a streak of lightning shot through the pitch black canopy above my head.

  I needed to get to safety. I looked ahead; the storm threatened what lay in my future. I looked behind; the storm taunted what I put in the past. There was no way out of this storm.

The waves turned from softly crashing to violently galloping at the sides of my boat. The crisp air turned into a musky fog. The breeze turned into a full-force wind that had the temperature of death in it. It was freezing.

I saw a figure walking towards me, within the storm. At first I thought I was going crazy, that it was only a figment of my imagination. The storm was making me think things that I shouldn't. The storm was giving me one more reason to fear.

But this was real.

“Come out onto the water.” He said to me. “Come out onto the crashing waves.”

I was frightened. “Are you insane? I can’t leave this boat. I’ll drown!”

That’s when I saw him fully. He was walking on the water. “Come out into your storm. Just keep your eyes on me and I’ll keep you safe.”

I stepped out onto the rolling waves. To my surprise, I didn't sink. I kept my eyes on him.

I began to look down at my feet. Surely enough, I was walking on the water towards this man that I never knew. Or maybe I did know him. But as soon as I focused my attention on my walking, my feet began to be immersed in the salty water below.

I focused my attention back onto this man, just enough so that I’d get back on my feet again, so that I could continue walking on the water. I didn't need his help. I could do this on my own.

Eyes on my own feet, I paced faster. Only the faster I walked, the faster my feet sunk into the water. It was beyond frustrating!

“Why aren't you listening to me?” The man said. “Keep your eyes on me and I’ll keep you safe.”

Once again, I focused my attention on his face. My feet stopped slipping and I regained my balance. This time I kept my eyes on him for a little bit longer so that I could completely get back on my own feet. I left his eye contact.

My feet began to slip faster than they were before. I can do this on my own! I can do this on my own! I only need to think hard enough about it.

Suddenly, my waist was submerged in the water, too far for me to pull myself up. I needed help now. I called to him. “Please, save me. I’m going to drown! I shouldn't have tried to do this by myself. I should have listened to you! Please, I don’t want to die! I’m drowning!”

Immediately, a dry hand grabbed mine. He pulled me up, and then pulled me close to his chest. He leaned in to whisper something in my ear. “Why did you doubt, you of little faith?”

I started to sob. “I thought I could do it on my own, but now I realize that I can’t.”

“Don’t cry, dear one. I've got you now.” He said softly, wiping the tears from my eyes. “Now, let’s try this again. This time… keep your eyes on me.”